So here’s what I learned from going to the largest snowball fight in history:
1- Seeing that I live by a spirit of a child, one would expect much hostility from me for such an event, yet such hostility wasn’t good enough for that crowd, as when I first entered the field, I thought that the big ice rocks were too dangerous to throw and I might hurt someone, that was right before I got hit in the back of my head with a larger ice rock of the size of a soda can.. And that’s when I declared war against humanity and went nuts on nice people I didn’t know.
2- When you see a big spacing right in the middle of the field where no one goes, and those who dare there are usually bombarded hard enough by everyone, that they no longer can see where they’re going, it’s usually not a good idea to go there -3 times- with the intentions of deliberately targeting the largest group of professional throwers in the field… also the third time where they might have been anticipating you and holding rocks in the size of a well fed babies might particularly be the worst idea. Moreover, just for the record when you lose a friend during the raid, you should always move on, there is a big probability that he has already became a lost soul.
3- Capturing a castle flag and running in the middle of the field is a great, fun, and exciting way to get killed. Especially when it has only succeeded a handful of time. So try to remember that when you’re doing it for the third time and around 5,000 people are shooting at you, and you get a killing blow right in your glasses (which by the way reminds me that real men don’t wear protective eye wear, also real men can get blind really, really quickly) it was your idea in the first place to take a random flag to a random castle that you chose to make your own.
4- When stealing 3 out of 4 flags by yourself fails to keep any of them from getting stolen back, then there comes a time where you have to do a ‘brave heart’-style-speech by shouting at random strangers about our collective loyalty to a big chunk of snow that we just happen to be close by and whether or not we are willing to kill other people for it. “this has to mean something” I said, “it’s going to be the largest hit in the day” I said… well you might’ve enjoyed the only organized attack that was done that day if you weren’t the one who’s organizing it, and volunteered to steel 3 flags at once while the rest of your loyal citizen bombard the enemy citadel as a distraction. You might have found it fun if you were not dragged by six random strangers (who are now the enemy) and thrown in the air for your pity crime of stealing the holy flags. But hey, at least you managed to pass the flags to a fellow freedom fighter before you were captured... Now your sacrifice has a meaning because your castle (remember the random chunk of ice you choose) is now the only castle that held the 4 flags at once, all thanks to the organized attack that you planned. You may now rest in peace.
5- Finally after getting beaten by everybody, it’s a bad idea to try to catch your breath when people are counting down to throw the largest amount of snowballs in history, it’s a bad idea to stand and look up in marvel and awe, it’s a bad idea to stand and look in general, it’s a bad idea to even stand…
Boy, those crazy folks were nuts… I mean, who takes a snowball fight that serious anyway? You know, unless you were fighting for a rag of cloth on a pole… then that has to mean something !
And just so you get the feeling of how it was, here's a very well made video that I might have appeared on, or didn't... not really sure, all nutbags look the same to me now...
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